“BRB, swatting away outdated notions of perfectionism. No one is perfect, yet we chase perfectionism in hopes of reaching a sense of fulfillment. If you don’t stop to smell the roses and be kind to yourself, you’ll get pricked by destructive thinking patterns. Start by giving yourself room to slip up, whether that means going over your calorie intake for the day, or staying up watching reruns at night. Save this post as a friendly reminder that perfection is overrated.” [NOOM]
Which banana in the image above is your ideal one: hard green, slightly green, yellow, spotted or something in between? I’m pretty sure our favorites are not the same. Does that mean the one I choose is inherently better than the one you chose. Nope. No banana is perfect to everyone.
Humans are basically glorified bananas. We are all in a different stage of ripeness which means my best might not be good enough for you. Your ripeness might not suit my preferences. And even if you could attain perfection, you certainly won’t be to everyone.
If we can’t find fulfillment in being perfect, where can we find it? A lot of us get trapped into trying to fill it with s-t-u-f-f: food, shopping, drinking, partying, drugs and lots of other naughty stuff. Truthfully these things can feel fulfilling temporarily, but they end up being just another trap. So maybe we should all stop trying to be perfect and try being the best version of ourselves instead. That’s a big enough challenge.
And how to we find the freedom to be ourselves, even if we’re not perfect? Jesus Christ. John 8:36 says: “So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” The need for perfection was ended with Christ. Now we are free. Walk in that – and be your own best banana.
God is not human, that he should lie, not a human being, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill? Numbers 23:19
Humans are known for… changing our minds. But that’s not how we were created to be. I was created in the image of a trustworthy God who does what he says he will do. So were you beautiful friend! Yet we struggle don’t we? Maybe we can keep promises to others, but can we keep them to ourselves?
How do we grow into the person we were intended to be before the world got to us? I think that emulating someone who does this so well would be a good place to start. We all love a good role model because they inspire us to level up ourselves. So let’s fan girl over God and: pray, look and seek.
PRAY: to God. Sincerely pray. When you do this He will listen.
LOOK: for God. Don’t just glance around and wonder when He will show, but look with passion. Be enthusiastic about your search.
SEEK: Him with all your heart. He’s not really hiding but you may need to discover Him in places you’re not used to looking.
When you pray, look and seek you will find a God so worthy of emulating. And yet the question is what will you allow it to do in you? Will you allow the trustworthy nature of God to inspire a change in you? Spending time with excellence always makes me want to reach higher, do better and conquer my struggles with renewed dedication.
Do you want to be known as someone who makes goals and reaches them? Speaks action? Runs a faithful journey? I know I do!! But let’s be real about our humanity because perfection isn’t the goal. Growing more in the character of who we were created to be like IS the goal. Though it lingers… wait for it.
For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay. Habakkuk 2:3
Are you trying so hard but not coming through? Are you struggling to accomplish a goal or flat out failing? God is trustworthy. He does what he says. And it’s not an unrealistic goal to work towards being that way too. Keep praying. Keep looking. Keep seeking.
I was talking to a friend today about my lack of ability to make myself a priority in my own life. I will turn myself inside out like an octopus for someone else but if I have plans that are inconvenient to others… I will usually drop my own. I like to think of this as a wonderfully sweet trait, but I’m not so sure it is.
How can I yield to God’s cultivation of my life if I don’t even cultivate it myself?! How can I allow God to mature things in me if I won’t spend the time working diligently on me? What might seem generous to others takes away from God’s ability to grow me, when taken too far.
I need to allow myself to be changed. I need to get rid of some bad habits. I need to learn to correct myself. And I need to yield my desire to “not disappoint others” to God and let Him train me. As my beautiful friend reminded me, a full life is a combination of sacrifice AND self (not just self sacrifice).
Then he told them many things in parables, saying: “A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants. Still other seed fell on good soil, where it produced a crop—a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown.Matthew 13:3-8
Although this is often known as the parable of the sower and the seed, it can also be said this is a parable about the soil. All four types of soil are essentially the same dirt but are in different conditions and respond in different ways to cultivation. What made one soil more responsive and the other less? And also… what kind of soil am I versus what I should be? Let’s take a look at the four types:
PATH: The soil on paths would compact over time as people walked them over and over. A path was never plowed and never fertilized. In the parable, the seed that is sown on the path is not able to penetrate the ground because of this constant use. The condition of the first soil is impermeable, untrained and unhealthy.
ROCKY PLACES: The second type of soil mentioned in the parable is the “rocky places” or the shallow soil where the plow didn’t cut deeply enough to break up the shale or hard ground just below the surface. This soil produced only plants with weak, shallow roots. The condition of the second soil is minimally accessible or trained so even if it is healthy it doesn’t matter much.
THORNS: The third type of soil mentioned is the thorny soil, most likely found in the corners of the field where the plow couldn’t reach; here, weeds overtook what was planted. The condition of the third soil is minimally accessible, untrained and unhealthy.
GOOD SOIL: All the types of soils mentioned here are actually in the same plot of ground with one major difference: Only one area was fully yielded to cultivation, to being changed and prepared for planting. That area was called the good soil. Therefore the condition of the third soil is accessible, trained and healthy.
The greatest amount of fruit produced was not determined by how rich the soil was, but how yielded it was. The soil in each condition received seed, but not all produced quality fruit.
What kind of soil are you? I have been a lot like like the soil on the path. Unplowed by lack of time working on myself and unfertilized by not focusing on any of my needs. I need to make myself more of a priority and do the work God has for ME. And the best way is to become “good soil” so that God can cultivate what he wants in my life.
It’s the age of both hustle culture and treat yourself culture. This may look great on Instagram, but in real life this combo is burnout-inducing. I know I’ve lived in this dichotomous space over the years and it’s left me with some dysfunctional habits. I’m ready to tackle them head on. With me?!
This afternoon I read an article on breaking bad habits. Interestingly thought, it said that the best way to break a bad habit is to take advantage of a habit you already have built… hijack that one and transform it. Genius right? You can read the whole thing here: How to Build New Habits by Taking Advantage of Old Ones
I am going to try this with two habits. In order to hijack a habit you need to identify the habit you want to break or start. Then identify the four phases of the habit: cue, craving, response and reward. After that you just give it a go!
SNACKING: The cue that sets off the urge to snack is when I feel my energy dip. My craving goes straight to something extra tasty – like brownies or chips. Here I can hijack this habit and instead of grabbing chips with my grocery order or whatever else, my response will be to drink 20 ounces of water. This will give me an energy boost just like a snack!.However, the dopamine release I’m used to from the fatty, salty, sugary snack will be absent so I need to add that in through a happy reward.
EXERCISE: This is a habit I don’t have yet, so I need to look for a habit I currently do have and hijack that one! How about driving the kids to school in the morning? So the cue will be when I get back home after dropping the kids at school. The craving here is usually to have a quiet moment with my coffee and a journal. Here I can hijack this habit and instead of going to the coffee pot, my response will be to get on the treadmill for 60 minutes. Again, the dopamine release I’m used to from the coffee and relation will be absent so I’ll need to add that in through a happy reward.
So this is a tool I plan to use in lots of areas and you might find it helpful too! Let me know if you give it a go. Also, I’d love to hear any rewards you love. I am still thinking about that part. Hugs beautiful friends!
It’s very popular these days to accept everything about yourself and I am certainly here for having realistic standards. But truth still matters and gravity is real so I have decided to get some of this extra weight off once and for all. If I don’t make a better effort to get to a healthier weight it will become harder to enjoy life. After all, we’re not talking about a few cosmetic pounds. I need to drop about FIFTY pounds. So I am going to make some plans!
What specifically will I do? I can think of six things I will need to figure out in order to reach my goal of losing fifty pounds by the end of the year. At least six things that is. Here are my ideas:
Food: Eat oatmeal for breakfast. Protein and vegetables for lunch and dinner. Sweet treat once a week.
Water: Drink lots of it. It will give me more energy and help me stay on track. Go for 100 ounces every day.
Mindfulness: Pay attention to what I’m doing. Eat with my goals in mind not just for fun or stress relief. Work out to reach my goals.
Exercise: Walk an hour each day + strength train three times a week.
Stress: Figure out ways to deal with stress that don’t involve eating. Use NOOM strategies for building resiliency.
Sleep: My sleep goal is to keep it regular. I also want to make efforts toward getting up at 6am and going to bed by 10pm.
In order to measure how I’m doing I will use the scale. I know there are lots of opinions about scales, but since I am working on reducing my weight I think it’s the best tool for me. I have created a WEIGHT CHART to keep track of my progress. It’s clearly no secret so take a peek and feel free to follow along.
Is it attainable to lose the weight in this time period? I think so. There are a little over nine months left in the year. I need to lose five to six pounds a month to reach my goal. That comes to less than a pound and a half each week. But it will require consistent effort, so I need to keep on track.
Keeping my weight loss relevant to my everyday life is going to be crucial to my success, because forgetfulness is my worst enemy. To keep this goal fresh in my mind I will keep a daily journal. When I see it I will remember my health goal is more relevant to my happiness than a brownie. I will use HABIT HIJACKS too!
The deadline for this goal is the end of 2022. Why? So I can be done! Why drag it out!! As a reward for reaching my goal I will [insert amazing reward tbd]. If I reach my goal I get the reward, I just have to figure out what it will be. Simple!
Alright! I am going to post this and get to bed (because that’s part of this healthy plan). Thanks for reading beautiful friend!
ᖇEᑕᒪᗩIᗰEᗪ GIᖇᒪ 